With Andrew Bynum’s knee collapsing for a record 23rd time last night and Kobe Bryant becoming the most hated homophobe since 2001 Eminem it doesn’t seem like things could get much worse for the Lakers, especially with the possibility that with a loss tonight the Lakers could slide behind Dallas in the Western Conference Standings.
But just when you think it’s time to put up your purple and gold umbrella the skies pour down another storm of shit in the form of a disease that is all but eradicated in most of us before we learn how to wipe our own ass – that’s right, the Lakers could very well be infected by the chicken pox.
Backup point guard Steve Blake recently started getting red marks all over him and is probably knee deep in an oatmeal bath.
Meanwhile Kobe himself has never had the pox and it isn’t sure whether he has been vaccinated (probably because when a reporter asked about it he just smiled and said “fuck”). Andrew Bynum hasn’t had the pox either but with his gimpy leg it might not matter.
The last potential carrier is even more shrouded in mystery. Despite an L.A. Times report that says that Ron Artest has never had chicken pox he claims he had it when he was a baby, which could very well mean last week. So in case somebody contacts the insane asylum he grew up in we may never know. Hopefully he’ll just infect a few players from the other team too.
I think this story is just too much for me to take right now. When I read this this morning my only reaction was, “you hear that Ed? Bears!”
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