(415): u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
(404): Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
(412): Dude, you need to talk to your mom
(724): wtf?
(412): She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
(303): I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
(775): somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
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