Look out early grave, here I come

Move over, Twinkies: Deep-fried butter is here
Inventor of fried Coke and fried cookie dough is ‘back with a vengeance’
By Laura T. Coffey/TODAYShow.com contributor

Who among us hasn’t simultaneously marveled and shuddered over accounts of deep-fried Twinkies? Deep-fried Oreos? Deep-fried bacon?

Well, brace yourself, because a new deep-fried item has been invented that’s so bold, so audacious, so brazen, it’s bound to take your breath away. The invention is none other than:

Deep-fried butter.

That’s right. This artery-clogging, heart-stopping dish is among eight new deep-fried concoctions that will be unveiled to the public at the State Fair of Texas in Dallas later this month. Each year, fair concessionaires try to outdo themselves by dreaming up recipes that could send you racing to your cardiologist if they became regular staples of your diet. The friendly competition has become so intense that fair officials have dubbed the fairgrounds the “Fried Food Capital of Texas.”

This year’s fried butter entry is the brainchild of 39-year-old Dallas resident Abel Gonzales Jr., winner of past state fair competitions for his Texas Fried Cookie Dough, Fried Peanut Butter, Jelly and Banana Sandwich and Fried Coke recipes.

(That’s right. Fried Coke.)

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To make fried butter, the butter itself needs to have an outer coating, or shell, if you will — something that can withstand the bubbling cauldron of the deep fryer.

“I mean, butter by itself does not taste good,” Gonzales said. “Nobody just grabs a stick of butter and eats it. That would be gross.”

So here’s what Gonzales does: He takes 100 percent pure butter, whips it until it is light and fluffy, freezes it, then surrounds it with dough. The butter-laden dough balls are then dropped into the deep fryer.

For purists who just want the unadulterated taste of butter, Gonzales serves up plain-butter versions of his creation. For others who want a little more pizzazz, he offers three additional versions with flavored butters: garlic, grape or cherry.

“When you taste it, it really does taste like a hot roll with butter,” said Sue Gooding, spokeswoman for the State Fair of Texas. “It tastes great.”

“It’s like a mix between a biscuit or a croissant that is just stuffed to the gills with butter on the inside,” Gonzales said. “I think that’s the best way to describe it.”

An order of fried butter will get you three or four pieces of piping-hot dough in a little cardboard boat.

“Any more than that and I think it would be a little bit too much,” Gonzales said. “A little bit too rich.”

You have to love the resolve of some Americans to try and make themselves and their families/friends die faster. What other excuse could this guy have for fried butter other than trying to think of ways to be a glutton? I can see fried cookies, fried ice cream, etc. In those cases, you're taking something yummy and frying it. But just like Gonzales said, butter doesn't taste good by itself. So to experiment with frying it, one's only goal must be to create a glutton's treat.

That said, I'd be willing to shave a few weeks off my life and try a piece. If anyone is going to be at the State Fair (UT vs. OU), let me know and I will give you a small cooler so you can transport me back some fried butter. Do my bidding minions!