Cut It Out

Police: Man made up knife attack to miss work
AP

EDGEWATER, Colo. -Police in the Denver suburb of Edgewater say a man stabbed himself, then said he was attacked by three men dressed in black who were either Hispanic or skinheads, in a ploy to miss work.

Twenty-nine-year-old Aaron Siebers was arrested after police say he admitted making up the assault and said he was responsible for the knife wound to his leg and other superficial cuts on his body. He faces charges of false reporting and obstructing a police officer.

Police say Siebers reported the attack Monday to the video store where he works. The reported assault drew five police agencies to the scene, along with K-9 units.
Police spokesman Steve Davis says Siebers admitted the story was a lie after repeated questioning from detectives.

This might be the biggest miscalculation I've ever seem in my life. Did this guy even consider calling the video store and telling them he had strep throat or that his grandma was dead. Maybe he thought that wasn't fool proof enough. But I think it might have been a bad move to stab myself in the leg and cut myself a bunch of times to get out of going to a minimum wage job. If I hated it that much I'd probably just quit and start selling drugs. And any dude who would stab himself to get out of work would probably sell drugs.