Bed, Bath and Beyond Belief

Man stuffed 75 bottles of lotion in his pants
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

SPRINGFIELD, Mass. - Police say a man who stuffed 75 bottles of body lotion in his pants couldn't slip away from authorities, hampered by slacks that were nearly bursting at the seams.

Springfield police say 30-year-old Chamil Guadarrama was charged with larceny after the incident Wednesday night at Bath and Body Works in the Eastfield Mall.

Police say mall security officers chased Guadarrama, but he had stuffed so many of the eight-ounce(225-gram)lotion containers in his pants that he could barely run. Police say he could not bend over to get in the police car until some of the bottles were removed.

This guy must have had some pretty big pants to be able to fit 75 bottles of lotion. They would have had to be cargo pants or sweats or something because in the skinny jeans era, there's no way one can fit more than a bottle or two. What really begs the question is what Chamil had planned for all this lotion. I can't imagine the stuff is all that valuable. The most a fence would give him for it is maybe a few bucks. Maybe he just happened to find the one drug dealer in Springfield with really dry skin.