Beary Necessary

Need to get over your ex? Call Death Bear
By Laura T. Coffey/TODAYshow.com contributor

More than 2,400 years ago, Socrates said, “The hottest love has the coldest end.”

Which kind of makes you wonder: Could Socrates have benefited from the services of Death Bear?

It turns out that a lot of people are identifying with Death Bear in a big way, especially as the romantic trappings of Valentine’s Day close in all around them. You see, Death Bear — a rather intimidating, 7-foot-tall character created by New York performance artist Nate Hill — is a self-appointed public servant for the bereft and the brokenhearted.

Instead of fighting crime in Gotham City the way Batman does, this superhero pays solemn visits to the homes of Brooklyn residents who are struggling to move on with their lives after breakups and other painful experiences. And as that unmentionable, Cupid-inspired holiday neared, he added extra days to his schedule.

Hill’s Web site shares this description of what Death Bear does for people:


“We all have someone or something we would rather just forget. Things fall apart. Love hurts. Dreams die. But when you summon Death Bear to your door, you can rest assured that help has come.

“Death Bear will take things from you that trigger painful memories and stow them away in his cave where they will remain forever, allowing you to move on with your life. Give him an ex’s clothes, old photos, mementos, letters, etc. Death Bear is here to assist you in your time of tragedy, heartbreak and loss.”

Hill, 32, has visited dozens of homes as Death Bear, encountering all sorts of people eager for catharsis and fresh starts. Most who summon him have endured a crushing breakup or other romantic loss.

“Some people are really, seriously hurting,” Hill said. “I get framed pictures of them with their exes, and I get their exes’ clothes ... A few people have gotten a little choked up. No one has actually cried. I think they kind of hold back because they can’t see my face [in the costume], so they don’t know how I’m responding.”


The costume — a black jumpsuit, black boots and a shiny, hard black bear head — is much more reminiscent of Darth Vader than, say, Winnie the Pooh. But people who have received visits from Death Bear say he’s a comforting presence, not a scary one.

“He was very cordial and kind of somber, actually,” said Teresa Tsai, 33, who offered up framed photos and a white collared man’s shirt to Death Bear. “It was almost like sacrificing something to alleviate the feeling of a heavy heart. It’s all symbolic, but it really did help.”

Large underwear, rotten eggnog
To be sure, things don’t always go smoothly for Death Bear as he makes his rounds — and sometimes they turn downright nutty. His massive black, shiny bear head sometimes crashes into chandeliers and doorways. And sometimes people summon him for unexpected reasons.

One time a woman handed him an exceptionally large pair of panties.

Another person — possibly someone suffering from a doozy of a hangover? — gave Death Bear beer funnels, the kind that attach to a person’s head.

On yet another occasion, Hill visited an apartment as Death Bear and got ambushed by his own ex-girlfriend.

“Yeah, when I saw my ex-girlfriend I realized it was a bad situation to be in,” Hill said. “She made a fuss, started screaming, slapping me in the mask ... That’s the strangest thing that’s happened to me with Death Bear.”

Hill doesn’t charge any money for visiting people’s homes as Death Bear, although he does score the occasional tip. (“But that’s rare,” he said.)



Where the hell was this bear when I needed him? The only thing I had to help me in 2007 was alcohol and a group of friends with nothing better to do than join in on a binge. Plus I listened to a lot of George Strait. A LOT of George Strait. I'm not sure why these people need a guy in a bear costume to throw this stuff away. You'd think they could do it or have a friend do it. But I guess it just proves my point that bears make everything better. Maybe I can start one of these services in Odessa. It'd be a good excuse to wear a bear costume and I could certainly use some supplemental income.