Today, I realized that each time I order pizza, I spend the 45 minutes getting my front room pretty and making sure I look good before the pizza guy gets here, just because you never know when you're going to end up madly in love, like in the movies. I only end up with pizza and self-loathing. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie when he leaned in close and passionately kissed me on the lips. When we parted, he asked, "Now, will you make me sandwich?" FML
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