Man acquitted in romantic bear-spray squabble
SF Gate
A San Francisco man was acquitted Thursday of breaking into
his ex-fiancée’s house and assaulting her new lover before getting sprayed with
bear mace by a shirtless neighbor.
Jurors deliberated for just three hours before finding
Christoper Hall, 31, innocent of the two felonies.
The “chaotic and confusing” night began on March 25 when
Hall broke off his plans to marry his 34-year-old fiancée, said Deputy Public
Defender Phoenix Streets.
The two had met in a hacky-sack circle in early February and
announced plans to marry just two weeks later, Streets said. But the
relationship quickly turned tumultuous, Streets said, and the pair broke up on
March 25.
Hall took his few possessions and moved out of his fiancée’s
home and into a tree at Mclaren Park. But as Hall climbed the tree and
attempted to sleep that first night, he became cold and returned home, Streets
said.
Hall’s former lover was not there, so Hall “curled up under
a tarp under the woman’s backyard bushes,” Streets said.
Around 10 p.m., the woman, who had been at the movies with a
“new male friend,” returned home. The man “happened to be a former U.S. Marine
with extensive combat training,” Streets said.
As the woman and her new friend talked in the kitchen, they
heard noises outside and decided to investigate. The woman armed herself with a
knife while the friend grabbed a frying pan, Streets said.
As the pair approached Hall, he looked up and began yelling
and running after them, Streets said.
“As the woman closed and locked the door in Hall’s face, his
hand went through the window pane,” Streets said.
Hall opened the door and grabbed the Marine, demanding to
know who he was. The pair fell backward and scuffled for 90-seconds, Streets
said.
The Marine eventually put Hall in a headlock and encouraged
him “to take deep breaths and relax,” Streets said.
During the fight, the woman fled and told a neighbor that
Hall was going to kill the Marine, Streets said.
The neighbor “ran out of his house shirtless and armed with
an aerosol can of bear repellant,” Streets said.
The group hauled Hall outside, and he kicked the door,
prompting the neighbor to open the door and spray Hall in the face with bear
mace, Streets said.
Hall then picked up a rock and hurled it at the door before
fleeing the scene, Streets said. He was arrested several hours later.
Streets said that jurors did not convict Hall because they
did not find Hall’s ex-fiancée to be a credible witness. The Marine also
suffered no apparent injuries, Streets said.
“There was no doubt Mr. Hall had a terrible night, but this
case was grossly overcharged,” Streets said. “You cannot commit a burglary if
you have the right to be in a building. Mr. Hall had paid rent, made
improvements to the house and still had some of his belongings inside.”
Hall was facing seven years in state prison for the
felonies. He was found guilty of misdemeanor vandalism.
I guess you just can’t trust people you meet in a hacky sack
circle anymore!
Talk about your all-time bad breakups. This would make the
best country music song ever.
This poor bastard got broke up with and kicked out of his
house. Obviously, he’s a unpopular deadbeat because instead of staying with a friend
or getting a hotel room he tried to sleep in a tree. Of course, a tree wasn’t
that comfortable so he headed back home and slept in the back yard.
Then he finds his girlfriend had found a new man and brought
him home with her in the span of only a few hours. When he tried to confront
them he gets his ass kicked by a Marine. And if all that wasn’t bad enough he
got sprayed in the face with bear repellent by his former neighbor.
If an experience that bad befalls you it has to be a sign
that a change is needed. You’ve got to move or get a job or something. Or at
least stop dating girls from hacky sack circles.
Also, what the hell is bear repellent? Trust me, if a bear
is on your track spraying him in the eyes with some aerosol isn’t going to fix
the problem.
All in all this is the worst day since Dennis got his
revenge on that hippy on It’s Always Sunny.
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