What A Croc: Shoeless Sot Apprehended

Man runs off without Crocs, wets pants after break-in attempt, deputies say

By Brett Clarkson, Sun Sentinel

Dominick Andrew Giordano ran off without his Crocs and his bladder-control skills, deputies said.

The 32-year-old West Boca man apparently urinated himself after he tried and failed to break into another man's truck, then tried to flee, according to a Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office arrest report.

The reports lays out the allegations against Giordano:

At about 12:15 p.m. Monday, a West Boca couple stopped at the Chipotle at 9930 Glades Road.
While their Toyota Tundra pick-up truck was parked, a man later identified as Giordano tried to open the vehicle's door.

The driver, a 53-year-old West Delray man, yelled at Giordano, who took off running south.
Giordano's black Croc shoes fell off and he left them at the scene. He kept running to a nearby Discount Shoe Warehouse.

A deputy arrived to find Giordano walking out of the shoe store, barefoot and clutching a bag of new sneakers.

Giordano was told to sit on the sidewalk. At this point, the deputy noticed a liquid stream soaking his pant leg and from Giordano's breath, an "overwhelmingly strong smell of alcohol."

"While looking at the suspect it appeared that he may have urinated himself as there was a steady wet stream line running down his right pant leg," the deputy wrote in his report.

Giordano offered an explanation, according to the report. He said he thought the Toyota Tundra was his because he "used to have a truck."

At one point, Giordano also apologized and said, "man, I thought that was my buddy's truck," deputies said.

Here’s a good rule of thumb. If you can’t break into a house without pissing yourself then you might not be cut out for the other side of the law.





If there’s one thing that makes a good cat burglar its stealth movements and quick getaways.  Soaking your britches during a robbery attempt and losing your shoes in the ensuing getaway won’t get you cast in Ocean’s 14.

Plus, when you lose your shoes during a crime, don’t you think the cops would think first to check nearby shoe stores? Unless your feet are extremely sensitive, shoes can wait.

Perhaps I am a being a bit too hard on Giordano. When you’re literally piss drunk at Noon at a Chipotle a lot of bad ideas are going to start making sense. Drunk and shoeless is no way to go through life son.