Today, my boyfriend called me and told me he wanted me to stay the night. I decided to wear my sexiest outfit for him so I put on my kinky nurse outfit and drove over to his house. I let myself in his front door, to which I found 40 of my closest friends staring at me for my surprise birthday party. FML
Today, I was at a bar and very drunk. I went to the urinal and when I was done I went to zip up when I realized I never unzipped. FML
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