College Football Top 25

1. Florida (1) - The Gators followed their win against Kentucky with a week off. Crafty move. Especially with a concust QB. Not sure whether Tebow plays this week, but they may need him against the Tigers.
2. Texas (2) - The Longhorns also had the week off last week so they get to stay put at 2.
3. Alabama (3) - The Crimson Tide did not disappoint last week with another blowout win, albeit against lowly Kentucky. Next up for the Crimson Tide is a game against preseason media darling Ole Miss.
4. LSU (4) - The Tigers were the recepients of a lot of naysay last week but proved their worth with a win at Georgia. Now LSU looks to stay hot against visiting Florida. Hopefully for them, #15 won't make the trip.
5. Boise State (5) - The Broncos had their first poor performance of '09 with a lackluster showing against lowly UC Davis. I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt but there can't be any more of these games if they want to stick in the Top 5.
6. Virginia Tech (6) - The Hokies struggled a bit with Duke before putting the Blue Devils away. Tech will need a better showing this week against a jacked up Boston College team.
7. Cincinnati (8) - Cincy demolished Miami (Ohio) 37-13 as QB Tony Pike continues to impress. Noone has captured the imaginations of that city like this since Venus Fly Trap was grooving on WKRP.
8. USC (9) - The Trojans took care of buisness in typical form on a road trip to Cal. Now USC has the week off before tussling with the Notre Dame Irish.
9. Ohio State (10) - Another big win for the Buckeyes against Indiana. Now OSU will face Wisconsin who just retained control of Paul Bunyan's axe. I bet Brett Bilema shaves with it.
10. TCU (13) - The Horned Frogs defeated rival SMU 39-14 in the Skillet Bowl. I didn't even realize that game had a monicker.
11. Oklahoma State (12) - The Cowboys, much like the rest of the Big 12 took last week off. I bet OU wishes it had done the same.
12. Penn State (14) - All the Nittany Lions needed to get over their slump was a little juice - Juice Williams that is.
13. Oregon (21) - Maybe I'm hopping back into the Oregon bandwagon a bit too quickly but after two straight dominating performances the Ducks are looking like the team to beat in the Pac 10. Plus that Boise loss ain't looking too shabby now.
14. Mississippi (15) - I'm still not liking Ole Miss much, but I can't rank them lower than this. South Carolina may have the best defense in the nation so that loss isn't so bad. Ole Miss has a huge test in Bama this week.
15. Georgia Tech (17) - The Yellow Jackets picked up a big win against Mississippi State last week and remain in contention for the ACC title. Up next for GT - a fastly crumbling Florida State program.
16. Nebraska (18) - The Huskers are one play away fron 4-0 and flirting with the Top 10, but its all for naught if they can't get it done against the Tigers in Columbia. This may be Bo Pelini's biggest test as coach thus far.
17. Miami (23) - The Hurricanes are 3-1 after a murderous start to the season which could have left many teams 0-4. Kudos to the media's cocky knights in blinged out armour.
18. Iowa (NR) - I know the Hawkeyes are undefeated but I've seen this song and dance before. Kirk Ferentz has to keep this going consistently.
19. Kansas (20) - Kansas had the week off last week. Well played.
20. Oklahoma (7) - A tough fall for the defending Big 12 champs, but with their QB and best target out this is what they're capable of. Hopefully for OU, Bradford will be healthy soon.
21. Notre Dame (25) - The Golden Domers keep eeking out wins. In two weeks they face USC. If they win that one we could be looking at Heisman Trophy favorite Jimmy Clausen.
22. BYU (19) - I know BYU won last week but I had to drop them after the OU loss and Florida State's fallout. That OU looks less impressive and the FSU loss looks disheartening.
23. Missouri (NR) - Nebraska and Missouri cross paths Thursday in a game that has major implications for the division.
24. South Florida (NR) Nobody circles the wagons like the South Florida Bulls. But can they do it in late October and November? It remains to be seen.
25. TIE Wisconsin & South Carolina (NR) - Wisconsin is undefeated and must continue to win to show the last two poor seasons were because of external factors. South Carolina may have the best defense in the nation, but is there any offense?

Wal-Mart Person of the Day

What do Italian seniors wear when its too hot for a sweatsuit? You guessed it, mesh tank tops. I've got to get Boscoe one of those for X-Mas.

Braylon Leaving Cleveland On a Jet Plane

Edwards headed to Jets
ESPN.com

The Cleveland Browns have traded troubled wide receiver Braylon Edwards to the New York Jets.

In the deal, first reported by ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter, the Jets sent key special teams player Jason Trusnik, wide receiver Chansi Stuckey and a pair of draft picks to Cleveland.



"It's the right thing for us and for Braylon," Browns coach Eric Mangini said Wednesday.

In Edwards, the Jets obtained a receiver who gives rookie quarterback Mark Sanchez the legitimate deep threat they have lacked -- but who also faces an NFL investigation for off-the-field trouble.

"It's just another piece that we wanted to add," Jets general manager Mike Tannenbaum said. "We're excited to get Braylon. We think he's going to help us. It was a position that we liked, but it was also a position we felt that if there was an opportunity to improve, we were going to go ahead and try to do that."

The league is probing whether Edwards violated the league's conduct policy following accusations he assaulted a friend of NBA star LeBron James' outside a Cleveland nightclub Monday night.

Cleveland police are also looking into the incident.

Although Edwards hasn't been charged with a crime, the league's conduct policy states that discipline may be imposed for "the use or threat of violence."

I guess Cleveland really is serious about keeping Lebron in Ohio. I bet the mayor, Danny Ferry and Eric Mangini have been meeting for 36 hours straight about this. If I were the Browns I would have made Lebron agree to play home games for the Browns at TE to make up for the loss in the passing game. Of course, I guess you can't make Lebron agree to anything.

You know what would be really funny? If Lebron decides to leave for the Knicks at the end of the year and Braylon is waiting for him at Kennedy Airport with a bat when he gets there. I love rivalries.

Dadgummit!

Slow start amplifies Bowden criticism
ESPN.com news services

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. -- Florida State coach Bobby Bowden said Sunday he isn't planning on quitting anytime soon, but the chair of the university's board of trustees has seen enough of the man who transformed the program into a collegiate powerhouse.

"My hope is frankly that we'll go ahead, and if we have to, let the world know that this year will be the end of the Bowden era," chairman Jim Smith told the Tallahassee Democrat on Sunday. " ... I do appreciate what he's done for us, what he's done for the program, what he's done really for the state of Florida.



"I think the record will show that the Seminole Nation has been more than patient. We have been in a decline not for a year or two or three but I think we're coming up on seven or eight. I think enough is enough."

Bowden will not be asked to step down this season, a source told ESPN's Shaun King on Tuesday.

Bowden's contract runs through the 2010 season. Bowden had no comment Monday night.

Interviewed by The Associated Press on Monday, Smith said the arrangement with Bowden as head coach and his successor, Jimbo Fisher, as offensive coordinator isn't working.

"We've got too many bosses out there," Smith said. "Jimbo is in a very, very tough situation where people assume he has a whole lot more authority than he really has. He's getting blamed for a lot of things that's just not his fault."

The Seminoles are 2-3 for the first time since Bowden's inaugural season at the school 33 years ago, and 0-2 in the Atlantic Coast Conference for the first time, prompting commentary about his future.

Smith confirmed to the Democrat that Florida State president T.K. Wetherell and legal counsel Betty Steffens have been working with Fisher to finalize a contract for him as head coach.

"The president intends to announce we've negotiated a contract with coach Fisher," Smith said, according to the newspaper.

Fisher was deemed the head coach-in-waiting in 2007. If he does not succeed Bowden at the conclusion of the 2010 season, Florida State -- under the terms of its agreement with Fisher -- would have to pay him $5 million.

It is expected that the plan, when formalized, would also give Fisher the authority to make staff decisions as early as the end of this season -- such as choosing the replacement for retiring defensive coordinator Mickey Andrews.

With the pressure mounting on her husband, Ann Bowden told the Orlando Sentinel that Bobby has been betrayed by Smith and other boosters.

"I am angry," Ann Bowden told the newspaper on Monday. "I'm angry at some of our boosters that Bobby has worked for and supported, raised money for. And he's been such a top quality person, such great character and everything for this university. And for them to turn their back on him like that -- I don't care if he is 80 years old ... ."

Is it just me or are people starting to treat Bowden like a completely senile old guy? Making quotes about Bowden's future and making back room deals with Jimbo Fisher is sort of the equivalent of talking about Grandpa's persnickity nature while he's still in the room. We live in such a throwaway culture.

Far be it for me to tell any fan how he should feel about his favorite program. I'd like to think they would have more loyalty to a guy who is single handedly responsible for the success of the program, but I'm also the guy who called for a coach with a 9-3 record to be run out of town on a rail. But if the fortunes of my Huskers and the Seminoles were reversed, I can't imagine Tom Osborne being treated this way. But of course Osborne knew when to walk away. I hope this works out for Bowden because there is no other active coach I respect more than him. Good luck Coach Bowden!

P.S. - This is the kind of guy Bowden is. Watch it.

Niners Have Crabs

Crabtree, 49ers finally agree to deal
ESPN.com news services

After months of holding out, wide receiver Michael Crabtree has agreed to a contract with the San Francisco 49ers.

The deal, first reported by ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter, was confirmed by 49ers spokesman Bob Lange in a text message to The Associated Press early Wednesday.

Crabtree will get a six-year deal that he can void to five years if he meets undefined performance clauses, a league source told ESPN's Michael Smith.



The 22-year-old Crabtree is expected to report to the team's training facility Wednesday.

Crabtree and agent Eugene Parker met into the early-morning hours Wednesday with 49ers owner Jed York, general manager Scot McCloughan and Paraag Marathe, vice president of football operations. The two sides had gone almost three weeks without talking.

Coach Mike Singletary, whose 49ers lead the NFC West and at 3-1 are off to their best start since 2002, said Monday he would welcome Crabtree whenever he joins the team.

Well the odyssey of Michael Crabtree and the 49ers has ended. Now everyone who shelled out the cash for a Crabtree 49ers jersey can wear it proudly at Jones AT&T. I guess this means that Crabtree won't be accepting the job as assistant editor of the Back Yard Blog. But I have prospects. If Roy Williams' rib injury is serious I'm going to fly to Dallas and make an official offer. I'd say a free koozie and all the Colorado Bulldogs he can drink is fair.

On this day in...

On this day in...
1916 – Georgia Tech defeats Cumberland University 222-0 in the most lopsided college football game in American history.
1949 – German Democratic Republic (East Germany) formed.
1952 – "American Bandstand" debuts on a local Philadelphia station.
1982 – Cats opens on Broadway and runs for nearly 18 years before closing on September 10, 2000.
2001 – The U.S. invasion of Afghanistan starts with an air assault and covert operations on the ground.
2003 – Gray Davis is recalled as Governor of California, three years before the official end of his office term. Arnold Schwarzenegger is elected Governor.

Births
1897 – Elijah Muhammad, American Black Muslim leader (d. 1975)
1931 – Desmond Tutu, South African archbishop and Nobel Laureate
1939 – Bill Snyder, American football coach
1943 – Joy Behar, American television personality
1943 – Oliver North, American former military officer
1955 – Yo-Yo Ma, French-born American cellist
1967 – Toni Braxton, American singer
1976 – Taylor Hicks, American musician
1976 – Charles Woodson, American football player
1985 – Evan Longoria, American baseball player
1986 – Chase Daniel, American football player

An interesting smattering of birthdays with a couple two-fers. How about Joy Behar and Ollie North on the same day? I'd like to see them in a political smackdown, especially if Elizabeth Hasslebeck was nude in Ollie's corner. And Taylor Hicks and Charles Wood son on the same day. I wonder how old Taylor Hicks really is? Speaking of the Soul Patrol, Chase Daniel may need some soul when Nebraska beats Missouri's ass tomorrow night! BOOM!

Hold the mustard, hold the lettuce. Presby churches do upset us.

Ketchup, mustard covers church in break-and-enter
By Tamara Cherry, SUN MEDIA

Two young men have been arrested in connection with the robbery and bizarre vandalism of an Oakville church, police said today.

The Trafalgar Presbyterian Church, at Trafalgar and Upper Middle Rds., was broken into after a large plate glass window was broken sometime between Aug. 9 and 10, Halton Regional Police said.

"Once inside the church the suspects smashed windows and spread mustard and ketchup, taken form the church kitchen, over the entire church," police said.

Sound equipment worth more than $2,000 was stolen and damage to the church was estimated to be more than $10,000, police said.

Stolen items were found at a local pawn shop in Burlington on Sept. 19, the discovery of which ultimately led police two Hamilton men.

Both these guys need to be locked up for the theft and destruction but what's up with the ketchup and mustard spreading? This has to be extremely personal or these two guys are the two worst humans ever. Seriously, I understand the theft. It's an easily understandable motive. But why the hell would you spread hot dog condiments all over the church.

I'm convinced these two were either diddled by a youth minister or they need to be given life in prison. Part of that sentiment is just because I hate the idea of wasting ketchup. Unless its not Heinz. Then you can just smear it all over the choir loft.

Red Riot

Crosstown rivalry
BY LEE SCHEIDE/Odessa American

Odessa High defensive end Dejion Rangel was tired of waiting — tired of waiting to hit someone and tired of waiting for a victory over crosstown rival Permian.

Friday night at Ratliff Stadium, Rangel and the rest of his defensive mates took care of both issues.

Rangel and Eddie Garcia each had two sacks of Panthers quarterback Steven Pipes. Adam Daniels and Matt Gonzalez shared another and the Bronchos linebackers and defensive backs inter-cepted four passes as OHS earned a hard-fought 26-7 District 2-5A victory.

The victory improves the Bronchos to 4-1 overall and 4-0 in district play, alone in first place. It also snaps a three-game winning streak by the Panthers in the series.
“I was ready to put pads on and hit someone,” Rangel said in the middle of a raucous celebration after the game. “We knew that it was going to be a tough game, but we wanted to get out and take control of the line of scrimmage from the start.
“This is awesome.”

The entire Bronchos defensive unit came to play from the first whistle, which is why OHS coach Ron King likes to defer if he wins the coin flip. It gets his defense settled down quickly and Friday night, the Bronchos settled in and heated up the Panthers (2-3, 2-2) very quickly.

This was the first OHS game I've been to in quite sometime and probably the last one I'll got all season so I suppose I picked the right one. I came away pretty impressed with OHS aside from the fact that the players are so small. When I was in school I remember players being bigger. And I was the same size then so I don't think I'm imagining it.

Other than that, I got to see Bradley Marquez at running back. I've been hearing that this kid is good for some time and he is just as advertised. He loves running to the outside and will have to develop a more straight forward approach at the next level but that shouldn't be a problem. He has the frame to support more weight. With his elusiveness, he would really look great in Tech's system.

So to recap. The Bronchos are now 2-18 against the Panthers with me in attendance. Go Bronchos!

P.S. - I guess this is the way football players blow off steam these days. I don't think it beats rap wars and Keystone talls but what does?

Stick Em Up! Put the hot dogs in the bag!

Hot dog thief get 18 months in prison
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

WORCESTER, Mass. — A Massachusetts man who stole a hot dog from another man sitting under a tree in a park has been sentenced to 18 months in prison.

Antonio Judd pleaded guilty Monday in Worcester Central District Court to charges including larceny from a person, the Telegram&Gazette newspaper reported.

Police say Judd grabbed the hot dog in August after flashing what appeared to be a gun in Elm Park in Worcester.

Police reports say Judd began to devour the hot dog, spilling mustard all over his shirt. They say when he was arrested later he was carrying a pellet gun and a pocket knife.

Seemingly this guy only got sentenced to 18 months because he used a pellet gun. I don't think they would throw a guy in jail for stealing a hot dog. Or else I've been in trouble because I've snagged a few beers in my day. I never used a gun, but its a thought. If the Mexico money runs out I may have to resort to it.

P.S. - I heard Seth Meyers on SNL beat me to this story and made the point that if the theif would have stolen the man's wallet he could have bought lots of hot dogs.

F My Life Moment of the Day

Today, I flew in to visit my long distance girlfriend. When I got out of the cab, I saw her way down the street walking the dog, so I hid behind the bushes to scare/suprise her. Mission accomplished. I just wish I hadn't bought her that pepper spray. FML

Today, I was frustrated at work so to have fun, I wrote an email to myself saying that I was great and loved myself and should relax. I used all different colors and fonts. Instead of hitting "delete", I hit "print" without realizing. My manager got it out of the printer and put it on my desk. FML

Texts From Last Nite Moment of the Day

(267): Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?

(610): I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.

Wal Mart Person of the Day

If you don't like America you can GET OUT! Larry the Cable Guy said so and his colors don't run!

College Football Wrap-Up

I'm a day late and several dollars short but give me a break. At least I'm still trying. I went 7-3 on the official picks last week. That said, I made several other poorly thought out wagers and lost my Bodog nest egg. I then tried to win it back following Ron Jaworski's picks from the Tony Kornheiser show. I lost all of those too. Maybe next week I'll try James Carville's picks. Couldn't get any worse.

Oklahoma at Miami

Pretty solid game here. I watched it over at Boscoe's so I was floating back and forth between the game and patio sitting. It looked like Miami was able to get back to doing many of the things that made them successful in the first two weeks of the season. After the murderous four games to start the season the Canes are 3-1 and still in good shape in the ACC. Oklahoma meanwhile, is likely out of the national championship hunt but can still figure prominently in the Big 12. In fact with Bradford possibly coming back this week, this OU team could be twice as dangerous going into the Oct. 17 matchup with Texas.

LSU at Georgia
Everyone had questions about LSU going into this game and the Tigers were able to answer their critics. A three-point win is nothing to write home about but road wins are also hard to come by, especially in the SEC. The Tigers were especially effective slowing down a Georgia attack that had become quite impressive in the early part of the season. Now LSU must prep for the defending champs, with or without Tebow. Should be a great one.

Pac 10
I think we all saw the USC team we expected with the Trojan's destruction of Cal. I'm not sure how the Golden Bears will respond to two straight blowout losses but they better adapt quickly because the conference looks strong. Oregon took another major step forward with a pasting of Washington State. I know the Cougars are awful but USC didn't beat WAZZU as easily as the Ducks did. With LeGarette Blount possibly returning soon, Oregon looks tough. All the while, Stanford quietly took the lead in the conference after a 3 TD performance by RB Toby Gerhart. With some SEC squads failing, the Pac 10 could be the deepest conference in the land.


Washington at Notre Dame
The Golden Domers just keep getting it done, eh? I though ND had this thing well in hand but Washington crept back in the game behind the arm of Jake Locker. But it was Notre Dame QB Jimmy Clausen who made the difference in this game with another 400 yard performance and an overtime win. With a schedule that now looks tougher than it did to start the season, the Irish need to start putting opponents away but they have to like their resilliency.

Michigan at Michigan State

Much like Notre Dame, Michigan had been eeking out games right and left and it was bound to come to an end. Michigan came from behind with a great personal performance by QB Tate Forcier but Sparty was too much and won in the first posession of overtime. Big Blue still has a good squad and is showing signs of the development Rich Rod promised.

Heisman Race

I wanted to wait until a few weeks into the season before I started handicapping the Heisman but five weeks in this is what I have come up with.
5. Jacory Harris, QB, Miami (69-122-1,008 yards, 8 TD/5 INT) - After four weeks we probably know more about this kid than we do most of the other players in the nation. His four games have all been on TV> We've seen what he's capable of (good and bad). He still led Miami to a 3-1 start.
4. Tim Tebow, QB, Florida (44-68-643 yards, 6 TD/1 INT, 271 rush yards, 5 rush TD) - Not the usual stellar stats from Tebow but offenses have been struggling much more this year than last (Are defenses starting to catch up to the spread?). Nevertheless, Tebow is the leader of the #1 team in America and hasn't missed much action. He needs to return soon to keep his place.
3. Tony Pike, QB, Cincinatti (116-174-1,493 yards, 13 TD/3 INT) - Cincy is quietly 4-0 and Mr. Pike is the main reason. He's in the Top 10 in nearly every passing category.
2. Colt McCoy, QB, Texas (103-145-1,045 yards, 9 TD/5 INT) - A slow start for McCoy as well, not to mention five picks. He only had nine all of last season. But now McCoy has rested for a week and has a chance to start putting up some big numbers against the weak defenses in the Big 12.
1. Jimmy Clausen, QB, Notre Dame (100-148-1,544 yards, 12 TD/ 2 INT) - Yeah, I said it! Wanna fight about it? As much as we all may hate Notre Dame it appears that Jimmy Clausen has finally spread his wings and flown. Despite losing WR Michael Floyd two weeks ago, Clausen has topped the 300-yard mark in each game this season and threw for 400+ in a OT win against Washington. If ND can finish strong Clausen will be the favorite going into the game against USC.

On this day in...

On this day in...
1884 – The Naval War College of the United States Navy is founded in Newport, Rhode Island.
1889 – Thomas Edison shows his first motion picture.
1927 – Opening of The Jazz Singer, the first prominent talking movie.
1945 – Baseball: Billy Sianis and his pet billy goat are ejected from Wrigley Field during Game 4 of the 1945 World Series (see Curse of the Billy Goat).
1966 – LSD is declared illegal in the United States.
1979 – Pope John Paul II becomes the first pontiff to visit the White House.
2000 – Yugoslav president Slobodan Milošević resigns.

Births
1955 – Tony Dungy, American football coach
1963 – Elisabeth Shue, American film actress
1978 – Ricky Hatton, English boxer
1979 – Richard Seymour, American football player

Pretty weak day for birthdays. You knows its unexceptional when I throw a Patriot in there. Aside from him we just have a failed actress, a quasi famous boxer and a Mike Vick apologist. Of course today is the anniversary of the Curse of the Billy Goat. Somewhere Lil' Terry is crying into his giant pillow.

Brazen Braylon Bruises Bron's Bro

LeBron rips 'childish' Edwards for alleged scuffle

BEREA, Ohio (AP) -- Braylon Edwards was fighting mad Sunday, exchanging a few blows with one of Cincinnati's massive defensive linemen.

Later, Cleveland's contentious wide receiver allegedly took a swing at someone much smaller but with a towering, more famous friend: LeBron James.

And the King isn't happy about it.

James called Edwards "childish" for allegedly punching his friend early Monday morning following an argument outside a Cleveland night club. The Cavaliers superstar said Edwards punched his friend, Edward Givens, a promoter who was working outside the club around 2:30 a.m. EDT.

"I've never crossed paths with Braylon before, but it seems like there's a little jealousy going on with Braylon and me and my friends. I have no idea why," a protective and perturbed James said after practice. "I've never said anything to Braylon at all. But for him to do that is very childish. My friend is 130 pounds. Seriously. It's like hitting one of my kids. It doesn't make sense."

Edwards was not available for comment Monday as the Browns regrouped following their 23-20 overtime loss at home to the Cincinnati Bengals. He did post a message on his Twitter account, offering praise to James, the NBA's reigning MVP.

"I have no issue with LeBron," Edwards tweeted. "I respect and admire him."

James said he was home when the alleged fight occurred, but got a call from Givens telling him about it at 7 a.m. Monday.

"The situation is very sensitive right now, but it's unfortunate that it happened," James said. "Hopefully my friend is doing well."

Edwards faces possible disciplinary action from the Browns and the league.

The Plain Dealer first reported the incident on its Web site, cleveland.com.

According to a police incident report, Givens accused an unidentified man of punching him in the face following an argument at approximately 2:30 a.m. Givens, who is listed as 5-foot-7, 135 pounds on the report, said the 6-foot-3, 215-pound Edwards hit him with a closed fist. He told police he suffered a black eye and cut and was treated at a hospital.

Edwards' name did not appear on the report. He was not arrested and there are no charges pending against him.

His manager issued a statement, hoping to soothe any perceived bitterness or rivalry between two of Cleveland's biggest sports stars.

"Braylon has nothing but the highest respect for LeBron James as an athlete and person," Hayes Grooms said.

Browns coach Eric Mangini was aware of the alleged altercation and said he spoke with Edwards, who did not catch a pass in Sunday's loss -- the first time in 62 career games he did not have at least one reception.

"Personal conduct is very important to me," said Mangini, who has drawn criticism for fining players this season for breaking team rules. "I always want our players to put themselves in the most positive positions. This is something I will continue to gather information on."

Edwards, who has a long list of off-field issues since being drafted by the Browns with the No. 3 overall pick in 2005, was not in Cleveland's locker room during the portion open to the media.

On Sunday, he drew a 15-yard penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct after getting tangled up with Bengals defensive lineman Pat Sims following a pile-up near the end zone in the third quarter. He was the last Browns player to leave the locker room and Edwards spent several minutes after the game chatting in the corridor with Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco.

Edwards later went to View Ultralounge & Nightclub, a downtown hot spot located near Quicken Loans Arena.

Givens told the newspaper's Web site that he was outside greeting people when Edwards approached him.

"Braylon comes up and started saying things, degrading me," Givens said. "He said if it wasn't for LeBron (James) or the Four Horsemen (James' friends and business partners), I wouldn't have what I have, nor would I be able to get girls. Everyone knows Braylon has a problem with LeBron.

"I had to speak up for myself. The conversation started to escalate. As some of his teammates started to pull him back, he punched me. As long as I've known Braylon, I've allowed him and his friends to come into our events free of charge. Whatever jealousy he has with LeBron, he felt he needed to take it out on me."

The immensely talented Edwards, who is in the final year of his contract with Cleveland, has been a headache for much of his time with the Browns. While recovering from a foot injury -- he cut his heel running in his socks after practice -- last year, he was pulled over in his Bentley for driving 120 mph in a 65 mph zone.

He has dropped passes, criticized Cleveland's play-calling, argued with teammates and famously took a helicopter to the Ohio State-Michigan game in 2006 despite being told not to go.

Edwards was also out partying in March with teammate Donte' Stallworth, who later that night struck and killed a a 59-year-old pedestrian while driving drunk in Miami. Stallworth has been suspended for the season.

Mangini is trying to instill discipline to the Browns, many of whom took advantage of former coach Romeo Crennel's good-natured ways. Mangini wants his players to be accountable on and off the field.

"The thing I love talking about is how much they're doing in the community, who they're helping, how they're playing, all of those positive things," he said. "Sometimes things happen and you address them and you work to find out the best course of action, but the important thing for all of us is to be the best Cleveland Browns we can be."

For all his worldwide adulation, James has managed to keep a squeaky clean image. Without naming Edwards, he said he wished others would follow suit.

"I know how to handle myself as a professional athlete," James said. "I take care of my friends and my family. It's unfortunate that some guys don't understand you're a role model to kids and you should carry (yourself) that way, on and off the court, on and off the field.

"I'm one of the guys that looks at being a professional athlete as more than just being out on the court."

How bout that headline? BOOM! I mean, when you've got it, you've got it. That said, it sounds like Braylon Edwards is a bit of the problem child. Sounds like he's got a little Brandon Marshall in him. He better stop acting hard at the club. He can ask Marshall what that'll get ya. It'll get your teammate capped in the parking lot. Lebron James aint a bad boy. But the bad boys don't f*ck with him. Plus, Shaq is in Cleveland now so he could just citizens arrest all of these guys.

P.S. - Doesn't it seem like Lebron has reached the Oprah level. Like whenever a black person does something wrong he can just say he's disappointed and they have to tuck their tail and run. It must be nice to be that powerful.

Look Kids, It's Big Ben!

Steelers QB Roethlisberger visits area to host WWE Monday Night Raw at Wachovia Arena
By Jonathan Bombulie (Staff Writer)
WILKES-BARRE TWP. - Monday Night Raw turned into Monday Night Football when Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger hosted the WWE's flagship television program at the Wachovia Arena on Monday night.

Roethlisberger was introduced to a near-capacity crowd as the show's guest host as it went on the air live just after 9 p.m.

Wearing a black Johnny Cash T-shirt, a black ballcap turned backwards and jeans, Roethlisberger was met with as many boos as cheers when he first appeared in the arena.

He acknowledged the boos by saying he knew there were plenty of Philadelphia Eagles fans in the house, then attempted to win over the crowd - the male fans, anyway - by announcing the first match would be a "Diva Bowl."

With that, 12 female wrestlers in football pants and cutoff jerseys - as well as a female referee in silver hot pants - battled it out in the ring to a healthy ovation.

The WWE has been using celebrity guest hosts on its two-hour Monday night program since late June.

Roethlisberger didn't engage in any actual wrestling. When Chris Jericho and The Big Show, a wrestler billed as being around 7 feet tall and weighing more than 400 pounds, confronted the quarterback in the ring midway through the program, Roethlisberger called out his offensive line.

When Darnell Stapleton, Max Starks, Trai Essex, Justin Hartwig, Chris Kemoeatu and Willie Colon got into their stances and threatened to charge The Big Show, he and Jericho quickly left the ring.

Steelers coach Mike Tomlin offered no comment when asked his thoughts on his star quarterback jetting across the state for a wrestling show in the middle of the season.

Roethlisberger gave his thoughts in an interview with the Beaver County Times.

"I mean, it's our off day," he told the suburban Pittsburgh newspaper. "I talked to (Tomlin) about it. I didn't really ask for his permission. I talked to him about it to get a feel for if he was going to have a big problem with it. I figured he tell me. But like I said, it's our off day."

Well Big Ben followed up a great Sunday of costing me Monday by stepping inside the squared circle and facing off with some of the WWE's finest. Not sure how well things went because I decided to watch the Brett Favre Bowl and have not begun my DVR recap of the weekend. I'm sure he couldn't have done worse than Cedric the Entertainer though. Dreadful. How that guy continues to get work is beyond me.

Mike and Michael Sitting in a Crabtree

Singletary would like to have Crabtree this year

SANTA CLARA, Calif. (AP) -- Coach Mike Singletary said Monday that the San Francisco 49ers would still like to have first-round draft pick Michael Crabtree play for the team this season.

Responding to a report that Crabtree and his agent were about to renew negotiations with the team, Singletary said he would not close the door on Crabtree, even though the wide receiver from Texas Tech has yet to practice with the 49ers because of a contract impasse.

Crabtree, the No. 10 overall selection, is the only pick from this year's NFL draft to remain unsigned.

"Any guy that can play and help us win, I would never say, 'No, we don't need him,' " Singletary said. "We need all the good football players we can get."

Crabtree is seeking money comparable to higher picks. He has turned down a reported five-year, $20 million offer from the team that includes $16 million in guaranteed money.

The first-place 49ers are off to a 3-1 start without Crabtree, but their offense ranks 28th in the NFL. San Francisco's passing game also ranks 28th and none of the team's wide receivers rank among the league's top 50 in receptions.

The 49ers must sign Crabtree by Nov. 17 for him to remain eligible to play this season. The team would have a seven-week window before the 2010 draft to trade Crabtree if he doesn't sign. If Crabtree is not traded, he would go back into the draft next April.

Well, it looks like after two weeks of no discussion between Crabtree and the 49ers, an agreement is still possible. Despite San Fran's offensive struggles this season, the team is off to a 3-1 start and you would have to think they have the Niners have the leverage going into these talks. That of course is assuming that Crabtree and his agent will be reasonable and that may be a bit of a stretch.

I think S.F. will have to bend a little to appease Crabtree. Why not just guarantee his whole contract? What's an extra 4 million? Plus, that would make Crab the only player to have his whole contract guranteed. See, I solved another crisis. Now on to that whole Middle East thing.

P.S. - At least Michael's absence has spawned a great t-shirt.

Rams in No RUSH to Get Better

Limbaugh, Checketts team up in bid to purchase St. Louis Rams

ST. LOUIS (AP) -- The lowly Rams have someone who loves them.

Conservative talk radio host Rush Limbaugh said Tuesday he is teaming up with St. Louis Blues owner Dave Checketts in a bid to buy the Rams, owners of the NFL's longest losing streak at 14 and just 5-31 since 2007.

In a statement, Limbaugh declined to discuss details, citing a confidentiality agreement with Goldman Sachs, the investment firm hired by the family of former Rams owner Georgia Frontiere to review assets of her estate, including the NFL team.

Limbaugh also declined to discuss other partners that might be involved in the bid, but said he and Checketts would operate the team.

"Dave Checketts and I have made a bid to buy the Rams and we are continuing the process," Limbaugh said.

Forbes magazine has estimated the Rams franchise has a value of $929 million.

Frontiere's children, Chip Rosenbloom and Lucia Rodriguez, inherited 60 percent of the Rams when their mother died in January 2008. Billionaire Stan Kroenke of Columbia, Mo., owns the remaining 40 percent. It wasn't clear if the Limbaugh/Checketts bid was for 100 percent of the Rams or just the share owned by Rosenbloom and Rodriguez.

"Our strategic review of our ownership of the Rams continues," Rosenbloom said in a statement released late Monday. "We will make an announcement upon the completion of the process."

Limbaugh is a native of Cape Girardeau, Mo., about 100 miles south of St. Louis. He's so popular among conservatives -- fans of his show call themselves "dittoheads" -- that he has been called by some the voice of the Republican Party.

Limbaugh, who lives and works in Palm Beach, Fla., once worked for the Kansas City Royals and is an avid sports fan.

In 2003, Limbaugh worked briefly on ESPN's NFL pregame show, but resigned after saying Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb was overrated because the media wanted to see a black quarterback succeed.

Well at least if this deal gets worked out the Rams can say they have a 'rush.' Just not the one that produces sacks and forced fumbles. This one just spews partisan dribble and right-wing proaganda.

If you would have told me that Rush Limbaugh was interested in becoming an owner, I would have thought he was going to move to a country where he could own slaves. But with non-guaranteed contracts, his players will kind of be like endentured servants. That's got to count for something. Plus with a bunch of injured players around there's always going to be someone to bum Oxycontin off of. Here's betting the Rams don't sign any black quarterbacks anytime soon.

Fight off the Swine Flu and get drunk

UK prisoners use hand gel to get drunk
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

LONDON - A British prison says a bunch of inmates have been caught with their hands clean - using hand sanitizing gel to get drunk.

Peter McParlin of the Prison Officers Association says inmates were using it to make illicit alcohol.

The gel had been distributed around the prison to stop the spread of the swine flu virus. McParlin said on Thursday that giving inmates access to a gel with an alcohol content was unwise.

The prison has now banned inmates from using it. McParlin said the use of illicit concoctions made by mixing alcohol with fruit, water and sugar was as bad as drug use - or worse.

The claims of prison boozing follow reports of bare-knuckle boxing for money at the facility, the Verne prison in Dorset, in southwest England.

I'm always suprised at the inginuity of prisoners. How the hell did they figure out how to make booze out of hand sanitizer? MacGyver would be amazed by that one. I don't even understand how they make toilet wine. You'd think if these guys were so good at that kind of stuff they'd be better at not getting caught. Sometimes its easier on the inside than the outside. Shower time is not one of those times.

BYB One-Day Vacation

My presence has been requested in Lubbock. Chimy's is having a VIP party and they couldn't pull it off with out me. Actually I'm crashing it, but what's the difference?

The BYB will return Tuesday with the usual smattering of football and nonsense. In the meantime you can take some tips from the Fonz on how to avoid sexual predators. Fast forward to the 1:20 mark for some of the most awkwardly funny sex-ed ever.

Peace!

F My Life Moment of the Day

Today, an old friend that I never really liked invited me to lunch while she was in town. While driving back to her car, I couldn't find my phone, so she offered to call it. She found it under the passenger seat and also saw that when she called, her name came up as "Sabrina-IGNORE". FML

Today, my football team played in a game against our rival school that was just a few blocks away. We hadn't lost the game in exactly 49 years, we were playing for the 50th year win. We lost 63-0, and got booed off the field by our own crowd. FML

That last one is in honor of the OHS/Permian game. It's the 12 year anniversary of the 97 game. That was a really great night and the first time I got drunk in high school. What a sordid history that night berthed, eh?

College Football Picks

This week's games don't add a lot of intrigue to the college football season but there are some decent bets. Could be a week to get some school clothes money.

Winners are bolded. Here we go.

Virginia at North Carolina -13
The Tarheels are fresh off a close loss to Georgia Tech, but still have one of the best defenses in the ACC. Meanwhile, Al Groh is just buying time until he's fired. I think I'll take the Tarheels.

Alabama -16 at Kentucky
I bet on Arkansas and got 22 1/2 points last week against Alabama. I still lost. I'm convinced Alabama is really good and after Kentucky's performance against the Tewbow-less Gators last week I think the Crimson Tide are a three touchdown lock in this one.

Kansas State at Iowa State -3
Kansas State has had a close call with UMass and a loss to Louisiana Lafayette this season. Iowa State isn't a whole lot better but the Cyclones are good enough to pull this thing out by a touchdown in Arrowhead Stadium.

Penn State -7 1/2 at Illinois
Juice Williams and Regis Benn may be the two most overrated players in college football history. I haven't seen two offensive players accomplish less since Chad Henne and Mike Hart. Penn State gets back on track with a big win in Champaign.

Texas A&M vs. Arkansas -1 1/2
The Aggies lead the nation in yards as Jerrod Johnson is starting to look like a competent passer, albeit against some rather pedestrian opponents. Arkansas has yet to take shape under Bobby Petrino. Expect A&M to get it done in front of a pro Aggie crowd in Jerry World.

USC - 5 at Cal
I don't believe Cal is as bad as it played against Oregon last week, but this is the type of game USC lives for. The Trojans will storm into Berkley and cause more havoc than the last Phish concert.

The Big Games

LSU at Georgia -3 1/2
I like Georgia at home here. I think LSU is still a good team but with the way Top 5 teams have been falling its hard to go away from the home team, especially with the way QB Joe Cox has been playing for the Dawgs. I like UGA but I'd stay away from the bookie on this one.

Auburn at Tennessee -2 1/2
Despite the fact that I am a complete Lane Kiffin apologist, I'm still going to take the Tigers here. Gus Mazatlan has the Auburn offense playing better sooner than expected and the Vols may not have the guns to shut them out completely. I like the Tigers by a field goal.

Oklahoma -7 1/2 at Miami
I found this spread to be rather shocking. I know Miami crapped the bed against V-Tech last week but the Canes are at home and giving almost 8 points to a team playing a backup QB. I think OU wins but I can see this thing being a nailbiter. I'd take Miami and the points but its probably safer just to stay away and watch it.

Red Twitters
New Mexico -35 at Texas Tech
I think Tech bounces back strong in this one, but 35 points strong? I'm just not sure. 35 points are a hell of a lot, even on the road. The Raiders have had a lot of distractions. I'm just not sure they blow UNM out that bad.

Texts From Last Nite Moment of the Day

(717): so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.

(515): Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.

(949): if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.

Tweet Tweet: Leach ain't no twit

Leach mum on Carter suspension, opens up about Twitter
By Alex Ybarra/Managing Editor/Daily Toreador

During Monday’s weekly press conference, the first question fielded by Texas Tech coach Mike Leach was about the recent indefinite suspension of star-lineman Brandon Carter, which wasn’t a surprise.

But Leach — who at times makes it hard to tell if he’s joking or not — said he actually pondered whether to break his protocol of keeping football issues private and spill the facts on exactly why Carter was suspended.

“I woke up this morning, I thought, ‘For 10 years, I’ve never talked about any internal issues or anything like that.’ But I said, ‘You know what? Today, maybe I ought to. Maybe this’ll be the day that I’ll tell all the details,’” he said. “I’ll say all the stuff. I’ll mention quotations. I’ll say what was said. Then I said, ‘That’s exactly what I’m gonna do.’ And son of a gun, right before I walked in that door, I didn’t change my mind.”

Therefore, it’s still unclear why Leach benched one of the best linemen in the Big 12 Conference.

However, one thing is certain.

“Twitter has lost a little bit of business as a result of me,” said Leach, who said his players will no longer have Twitter accounts after Sunday’s fallout regarding the social networking site.

After the 29-28 loss to Houston on Saturday gave Tech its first back-to-back losses since 2007, Carter tweeted that this wasn’t how he envisioned his final season and that he felt like he let the team down. Then on Sunday, another tweet from Carter informed followers of his demotion.

“I am not a captain anymore and will not be playing this week,” the tweet read. “Good luck red raiders ill still be cheering on my family from the stands!!:).”

Also, senior linebacker Marlon Williams had a post on his Twitter account on Sunday calling out Leach for being late to a meeting.

Both accounts no longer are active.

Leach said there hasn’t been a policy in place prior to the incidents and that he wasn’t too aware of what was being said through the Web site, adding that “little twitter things that relate to football is a violation of team rules.”

He called Twitter and anything that is a distraction “stupid,” citing that college football players don’t need any more attention than they already receive.

“I’m not gonna sit around with a bunch of narcissists that want to sit and type stuff about themselves all the time,” he said. “We’ll put mirrors in some of their lockers if that’s necessary, but they don’t have to Twitter.”

Leach said he “saw this coming,” referring to players use of Twitter, after seeing how the National Football League has adapted to the popular site.

Someone or some group from the team will monitor Facebook for any kind of football information, Leach said, and action will be taken if anything is found.

But he was mum, once again, on whose task that will be.

“That’s a committee that’s very secret and the names of those people are in a vault deep in the bowels of our training center, which even the entrance to that is highly classified,” he said tongue-in-cheek. “We’ve had several people die over that sort of thing. We’ve killed all of them. I think even that’s dangerous to even talk about really.”

Full story here.

I agree with most of what Leach has to say about Twitter. In my short span as a big time SID in Mexico I counciled athletes not to discuss team business on social networking sites. Its quite possibly the worst thing a player can do. Its one thing to address issues with the media. At least when T.O. blasts his QBs to the press I think some part of him hopes it will result in a better offense. When you blast your team/teammates/coach on Twitter, you're just venting your own frustration.

That said I think Leach should have some accountability to his fans. He wants to soak up all the positive "genious pirate" praise but he keeps his program walled off to Tech beat writers and essentially the city of Lubbock. He better hope he never gets a high profile job because ESPN would be in his ass about this all week instead of just giving it 45 seconds of play on Tuesday's 'College Football Live'.

P.S. - I like his slams about Carter being egotistical. I have no knowledge of what Brandon Carter is like, but isn't this the same kind of stuff Leach used to say about Crabtree until he went pro and Leach became his knight in shining armor? Here's a thought. If you don't like prima donnas then stop recruiting them.

On this day in...

1789 – George Washington sends the proposed Constitutional amendments (The United States Bill of Rights) to the States for ratification.
1835 – The Texas Revolution begins with the Battle of Gonzales: Mexican soldiers attempt to disarm the people of Gonzales, Texas, but encounter stiff resistance from a hastily assembled militia.
1950 – Peanuts by Charles M. Schulz is first published.
1967 – Thurgood Marshall is sworn in as the first African-American justice of United States Supreme Court.
2002 – The Beltway sniper attacks begin, extending over three weeks.
2006 – Five school girls are murdered by Charles Carl Roberts in a shooting at an Amish school in Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania before Roberts commits suicide.

Births
1800 – Nat Turner, American leader of slave uprising (d. 1831)
1890 – Groucho Marx, American comedian and actor (d. 1977)
1970 – Kelly Ripa, American actress
1971 – Tiffany, American singer
1982 – Tyson Chandler, American basketball player

It's a sleepy Friday afternoon in the BYB. You know what that means. I think we're alone now. Doesn't seem to be anyone around.

Wal-Mart Person of the Day

You know they say that older men are much more distinguised and I see it here. That 'Just For Men: Touch of Gray' is the best way to go with that mullet. Way to go Arkansas dude!

Gopher Groin Gaffe

Its going to be a boring week of some lackluster games in college football but take heart, bad games can always give us gems like this. I had this game on last week but unfortunately I had the sound off and missed the dialogue between the trainer and player. Listen closely for a funny line.

Tuft Decision: University Ends Sexile

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So let me get this straight. Tufts University now says you can't have sex with your roomate in the room and you also can't send them out of the room while you have sex? I can see one or the other but I think adding both measures is just too much. That's why you don't go pot luck on roomates. Because inevitably some girl with a bubbly personality and a goal to have fruitful, rewarding relationships with several people is going to get bunked up with some ugly, selfish troll who bristles at the idea of having to watch TV in the common area for an hour or so.

And you know its girls doing this. Guys couldn't be complaining or it would be a violation of the man code. In fact, all guys know in that situation to pretend they're asleep and then peek over at the action or use a camera phone. This new rule may be the biggest thing to happen to college since Red Bull and Jager got together.

P.S. - This video from 'Undeclared' sums it all up. I wanted to post it but the embedding was disabled. Damn Judd Apatow! Click and watch it anyway minions.

Top 5

The Top 5 Sports Brawls continues with quite possibly the most awesome thing I've ever seen on TV.

#1 Ron Artest, Stephen Jackson and Jermaine O'Neal vs. Detroit Pistons fans

This is the much longer version of the video. Fast forward to 2:57 for when the action really picks up.



Once again fate shone down on me and this game just happened to be on one of the big screens one lazy Friday evening at Bash's. Noone was paying attention to it until we saw the dust up between Ben Wallace and Artest. Then the cup came flying at Artest and magic happened. This thing didn't end quick either. Once Artest got dragged down from the stands, fans started wandering onto the court. That's when Jermaine O'Neal landed the biggest power punch I've ever seen. Truly a great moment in sports TV.

Big Baby

19.2-pound baby boy sets record
By Denny Sitohan, THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

KISARAN, Indonesia - Indonesia's heaviest-ever newborn drew curious crowds Friday to a hospital where the boy named Akbar - or the Great in Arabic - came into the world at a record 19.2 pounds (8.7 kilograms).

Akbar Risuddin was born to a diabetic mother in a 40-minute cesarean delivery that was complicated because of his unusual weight and size, Dr. Binsar Sitanggang said.

"I'm very happy that my baby and his mother are in good health," father Muhammad Hasanuddin said Friday. "I hope I can afford to feed the baby enough, because he needs more milk than other babies."

Crowds pushed to get a peek of the extraordinary boy, who measured nearly 24 inches (62 centimetres) when he was born Monday, at the Abdul Manan hospital in the northern town of Kisaran on the island of Sumatra.

"This is fantastic," Dewi Miranti, a mother from a nearby village, said as she peered through a window with about a hundred other people. "He looks very well and is cute."

The baby's extreme weight was the result of excessive glucose from his mother during pregnancy, Dr. Sitanggang said.

"He is greedy and has a strong appetite, nursing almost nonstop," the doctor said.

The former Indonesian record holder was a 14.7-pound (6.7-kilogram) baby boy born on the outskirts of the capital, Jakarta, in 2007.

Guinness World Records cites the heaviest baby as being born in the U.S. in 1879, weighing 23.75 pounds (10.4 kilograms). However, it died 11 hours after birth. The book also cites 22.5-pound (10.2-kilogram) babies born in Italy in 1955 and in South Africa in 1982.

Geez, that's a huge kid. People from other cultures must have a higher threshold for pain because the mother in the photo doesn't seemed to phased. Imagine if some bitchy braud from the O.C. had to push a 19 pound kid out. I'm pretty sure there would be a reality show about it and she'd never stop complaining.

In a related story I've heard Nick Saban is already recruiting this kid to play LT.

F My Life Moment of the Day

Today, my 118 year old house went from "family dwelling" to "official crime scene". 2 bodies were discovered under the cement in the basement when we began renovations on our new family home. FML

Today, I went to a club with my friends. I noticed the bouncer looked at me strangely. Then he erupts and screams, "you're the bitch who caused havoc and $250 damage to the cloakroom, pay up or I'll call the fuzz!" Little did I know my 15-year-old sister stole my ID last weekend. FML

Texts From Last Nite Moment of the Day

(610): then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.

(251): Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
(1-251): Why are you in my underwear drawer?

(551): And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...

College Football TV Schedule

All the good teams are off this week so I'm off to Lubbock to drink and possibly tailgate. If you choose to watch, I suggest drinking heavily. But if Holly Rowe starts looking attractive, stop drinking.

October 1
Colorado at West Virginia, 6:30 pm, ESPN
Southern Miss at UAB, 6 pm, CBSC

October 2
Pitt at Louisville, 7 pm, ESPN2
Utah State at BYU, 8 pm, ESPNU

October 3
East Carolina at Marshall, 11 am, CBSC 613
Michigan at Michigan State, 11 am, BTN 610
Northwestern at Purdue, 11 am, BTN 611
Wisconsin at Minnesota, 11 am, ESPN
Arkansas State at Iowa, 11 am, ESPN2
Clemson at Maryland, 11 am, ESPNU 614/301
Alabama at Kentucky, 11 am, MSG 634
South Florida at Syracuse, 11 am, MASN 640
Utah State at BYU, 11 am, MTN 616

Iowa State at Kansas State, 2 pm, FCSC 307 Cable
New Mexico at Texas Tech, 2:30 pm, FSN
Florida State at Boston College, 2:30 pm, ABC/ESPN
Penn State at Illinois, 2:30 pm, ABC/ESPN
UCLA at Stanford, 2:30 pm, ABC
LSU at Georgia, 2:30 pm, CBS
Penn State at Illinois, 2:30 pm, ABC
Air Force at Navy, 2:30 pm, CBSC
North Carolina State at Wake Forest, 2:30 pm, ESPNU
Washington at Notre Dame, 2:30 pm, NBC

Ohio State at Indiana, 6 pm, BTN 610
South Carolina State at South Carolina, 6 pm, ESPN Classic
Kent State at Baylor, 6 pm, FSN
Ole Miss at Vanderbilt, 6 pm, ESPN 614
Tulsa at Rice, 6:30 pm, CBSC
Arkansas at Texas A&M, 6:30 pm, ESPN2
Georgia Tech at Mississippi State, 6:30 pm, CSNB 696
Auburn at Tennessee, 6:45 pm, ESPN
SMU at TCU, 7 pm, Mtn.
USC at California, 7 pm, ABC
Oklahoma at Miami, 7 pm, ABC
Colorado State at Idaho, 9:30 pm, ESPNU

For A Quick Pick Me Up

Bikini baristas sold more than coffee at Grab-n-Go
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

EVERETT, Wash. — Five Washington state baristas charged customers to touch their breasts and buttocks at an espresso stand where servers wear bikinis to draw business, police said.

The five were charged Wednesday with prostitution. Charging money for that kind of touching falls under the city’s definition of prostitution.

The Everett Herald reports the women were charging up to $80 to strip down while fixing lattes and mochas.

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During a two-month investigation, detectives also saw the women lick whipped cream off each other and pose naked for pictures at the Grab-n-Go Espresso stand in Everett, about 30 miles 950 kilometres) north of Seattle.

Owner Bill Wheeler told KCPQ-TV employees sign a policy prohibiting the kind of behaviour alleged by police. He said anyone caught doing anything illegal would be fired.

The women, ages 18 to 24, were not arrested, said Sgt. Robert Goetz. They were expected to be in Municipal Court in a few weeks to answer misdemeanour charges.

Police have received more than 40 complaints in the past year of women exposing themselves at coffee stands. Goetz said the department investigated Grab-n-Go because it had the most complaints.

“This was about alleged conduct, not about what the women were wearing,” he said. “They could have been wearing parkas and if they continued to conduct themselves that way, we still would have filed the criminal charges.”

Undercover detectives began posing as customers in mid-July.

During one visit, a barista allegedly told a detective that for $20, she and another barista would give him a show. He paid and they bared their breasts and pulled down their undergarments.

The women also charged customers to play “basketball,” a game in which customers threw wadded up money at the women, who caught the money in their underwear, detectives said.

The city council is expected to decide next week whether to change the city’s lewd conduct ordinance to cover espresso stands.

This story reminds me alot of the topless doughnut shop story I ran last summer. That place also got shut down for lewd behavior and was then burned down, no doubt by some misguided zealot. This country needs to have a serious discussion about crime. If an action doesn't hurt or threaten anyone, its not a crime. How are naked pictures and feelskies at the coffee stand hurting anyone? In fact, its probably the only part of some dude's day that doesn't suck. I'd beg to say the practices of those baristas kept at least one lonely guy from killing himself.

I think I should team up with these girls and the folks from the topless doughnut and we could start a nude breakfast type of thing at the old Satin Club. That way folks could go to Jaguars, have a good time and then come get some naked pancake action and a cup of Joe to sober up. I think I'd be doing the community a favor.

P.S. - That basketball game described in the story is really fun. I played it Jaguars once. Of course the game I played included a shot glass placed in an orifice. When I scored a basket me and the guys jumped around like I had just earned a spot on the Contestants Row on 'Price is Right.'

Wal-Mart Person of the Day

I love 'Full House' too but I think the mural of Danny Tanner may be a bit much. Thanks Kansas guy.

Don't Squeeze the Charmin

Environmentalists Seek to Wipe Out Plush Toilet Paper
Soft Toilet Paper's Hard on the Earth, But Will We Sit for the Alternative?
By David A. Fahrenthold/Washington Post Staff Writer

ELMWOOD PARK, N.J. -- There is a battle for America's behinds.

It is a fight over toilet paper: the kind that is blanket-fluffy and getting fluffier so fast that manufacturers are running out of synonyms for "soft" (Quilted Northern Ultra Plush is the first big brand to go three-ply and three-adjective).

It's a menace, environmental groups say -- and a dark-comedy example of American excess.

The reason, they say, is that plush U.S. toilet paper is usually made by chopping down and grinding up trees that were decades or even a century old. They want Americans, like Europeans, to wipe with tissue made from recycled paper goods.

It has been slow going. Big toilet-paper makers say that they've taken steps to become more Earth-friendly but that their customers still want the soft stuff, so they're still selling it.

This summer, two of the best-known combatants in this fight signed a surprising truce, with a big tissue maker promising to do better. But the larger battle goes on -- the ultimate test of how green Americans will be when nobody's watching.

"At what price softness?" said Tim Spring, chief executive of Marcal Manufacturing, a New Jersey paper maker that is trying to persuade customers to try 100 percent recycled paper. "Should I contribute to clear-cutting and deforestation because the big [marketing] machine has told me that softness is important?"

He added: "You're not giving up the world here."

Toilet paper is far from being the biggest threat to the world's forests: together with facial tissue, it accounts for 5 percent of the U.S. forest-products industry, according to industry figures. Paper and cardboard packaging makes up 26 percent of the industry, although more than half is made from recycled products. Newspapers account for 3 percent.

But environmentalists say 5 percent is still too much.

Felling these trees removes a valuable scrubber of carbon dioxide, they say. If the trees come from "farms" in places such as Brazil, Indonesia or the southeastern United States, natural forests are being displaced. If they come from Canada's forested north -- a major source of imported wood pulp -- ecosystems valuable to bears, caribou and migratory birds are being damaged.

And, activists say, there's just the foolish idea of the thing: old trees cut down for the briefest and most undignified of ends.

"It's like the Hummer product for the paper industry," said Allen Hershkowitz, senior scientist with the Natural Resources Defense Council. "We don't need old-growth forests . . . to wipe our behinds."

The reason for this fight lies in toilet-paper engineering. Each sheet is a web of wood fibers, and fibers from old trees are longer, which produces a smoother and more supple web. Fibers made from recycled paper -- in this case magazines, newspapers or computer printouts -- are shorter. The web often is rougher.

So, when toilet paper is made for the "away from home" market, the no-choice bathrooms in restaurants, offices and schools, manufacturers use recycled fiber about 75 percent of the time.

But for the "at home" market, the paper customers buy for themselves, 5 percent at most is fully recycled. The rest is mostly or totally "virgin" fiber, taken from newly cut trees, according to the market analysis firm RISI Inc.

Big tissue makers say they've tried to make their products as green as possible, including by buying more wood pulp from forest operations certified as sustainable.

But despite environmentalists' concerns, they say customers are unwavering in their desire for the softest paper possible.

"That's a segment [of consumers] that is quite demanding of products that are soft," said James Malone, a spokesman for Georgia-Pacific. Sales figures seem to make that clear: Quilted Northern Ultra Plush, the three-ply stuff, sold 24 million packages in the past year, bringing in more than $144 million, according to the market research firm Information Resources Inc.

Last month, Greenpeace announced an agreement that it said would change this industry from the inside.

The environmental group had spent 4 1/2 years attacking Kimberly-Clark, the makers of Kleenex and Cottonelle toilet paper, for getting wood from old-growth forests in Canada. But the group said it is calling off the "Kleercut" campaign: Kimberly-Clark had agreed to make its practices greener.

By 2011, the company said, 40 percent of the fiber in all its tissue products will come from recycled paper or sustainable forests.

"We could have campaigned forever," said Lindsey Allen, a senior forest campaigner with Greenpeace. But this was enough, she said, because Kimberly-Clark's changes could alter the entire wood-pulp supply chain: "They have a policy that . . . will shift the entire way that tissue companies work."

Rest of story here.

There's two things I refuse to cheap on: ketchup and toilet paper. Any person who does not purchase Heinz or Charmin is seriously dancing on my fault line. Life's too short to eat terrible ketchup and have a chafed ass. That aside I've often fancied myself as a pretty liberal thinker and willing to make changes to benefit my world, but I've got to draw the line on TP.

Its pretty obvious to me the Green people have a weak ass lobby and can't get a thing done on Capitol Hill to sway auto makers, manufacturers, etc and slow global warming. What they can do is drone on about how if I wipe my caboose with a piece of sandpaper then I'm saving the world. That's like a school bus on a Sunday, I'm not buying it! Sheryl Crow and her flunkies can leave my ass alone. Actually, Sheryl Crow can have access but I still get to use Charmin.

WOO!

Ric Flair Is Honored With His Own Commemorative Lottery Tickets
By Will Brinson/Fanhouse

Ric Flair is an icon among wrestling fans, not only worldwide but in North Carolina as well. He's always appearing on the Carolina Panthers jumbotron, screaming something or another about not drinking and driving (WOO!) and he's been known to show up at college football games and tailgates across the state.

And now he's been honored with his own commemorative scratch-off lottery tickets, designed specifically to help the children of North Carolina become more smarter. Or something.



Lottery executive director Tom Shaheen said the ticket could help attract new players.

"We are always looking for ways to appeal to new players so we can maximize sales and generate as much money as possible for education."

The tickets feature SIXTEEN different scratchy areas, which represent the 16 separate championship belts that Flair won during his career. So, yeah, that's awesome.

Also awesome: the chance to win $100,000, which is the top payout for the Flair tix (on sale September 22, resident NC degenerates!).

For years we've been hearing Ric Flair talk about the limosuine riding', the jet flyin', the wheelin dealin' and kiss stealin' but now Flair is giving his fans a chance to join him in the ranks of the slightly wealthy. Its probably good I don't live in North Carolina or I spend my leftover Mexico money on as many Ric Flair scratch offs as I could buy. Maybe I could win enough to get a Ric Flair wig. I think platinum blonde would go well with my eyes.

Maybe It Was a Shovel Pass

Shovel-wielding lineman escalates football brawl
Associated Press

Steamed over a practice brawl, a Canadian Football League lineman stomped off the field, then stormed back moments later brandishing a real shovel.

As Edmonton Eskimos defensive tackle Xzavie Jackson marched toward teammate Aaron Fiacconi on Thursday, general manager Danny Maciocia stepped into his path. The GM gently put his hand on Jackson's chest and gestured toward the shovel.

“I just said, ‘What are you planning on doing with that? Do you realize the repercussions?'” Maciocia said Friday. “I'm almost sure he had already come to that conclusion.”

“I don't think he would have carried out an incident where he would have swung a shovel and tried to strike someone,” he said.

The bizarre fight began when Fiacconi, the starting center and a CFL veteran, was working out at three-quarters speed while Jackson, a spot starter and practice-squad player, was going at a faster tempo.

After a bit of banging, Fiacconi began punching Jackson. No teammates intervened and Jackson, a former Missouri star who had stints with the Philadelphia Eagles and Cincinnati Bengals, thundered away.

As Jackson yelled and whipped off his practice jersey, he walked past a nearby dumpster. He spotted a long-handled metal shovel, grabbed it and headed back at Fiacconi.

Jackson rejoined the Eskimos at practice Friday, sporting sunglasses and a bandage over a swollen eye.

“I'm very disappointed,” he said. “That's not me. That's not my character. I know I could've made a better choice. I've apologized to my teammates and that's all.”

Fiacconi accepted the apology.

“We've made our peace,” he said. “In the end, I doubt he would have done something with the implement.”

After reading this story maybe I think we might overreact a little bit too much when we see pre-game dustups between American football teams or brawls between baseball teams. At least noone has grabbed a blunt instrument and tried to impale anyone's face yet. Leave it to a guy from Missouri to start the trend.

What I'm really wondering though is if there is any way the Bills can trade T.O. to Edmonton. I'm not sure if there's an interleague trade policy. If not, I'm willing to buy Trent Edwards a shovel.

On this day in...

On this day in...
1890 – The Yosemite National Park and the Yellowstone National Park are established by the U.S. Congress.
1891 – In the U.S. state of California, Stanford University opens its doors.
1903 – Baseball: The Boston Americans play the Pittsburgh Pirates in the first game of the modern World Series.
1931 – The George Washington Bridge linking New Jersey and New York opens.
1946 – Nazi leaders sentenced at Nuremberg Trials.
1949 – The People's Republic of China is declared by Mao Zedong.
1957 – First appearance of "In God We Trust" on U.S. paper currency.
1962 – First broadcast of The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson.
1971 – Walt Disney World opens near Orlando, Florida, United States.
1982 – Sony launches the first consumer compact disc player (model CDP-101).
2004 – Baseball: Seattle Mariners outfielder Ichiro Suzuki gets his 258th hit of the season, breaking George Sisler's 84-year-old single-season record.

Births
1881 – William Boeing, American engineer (d. 1956)
1924 – Jimmy Carter, 39th President of the United States, recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize
1924 – William Rehnquist, 16th Chief Justice of the United States (d. 2005)
1927 – Tom Bosley, American actor
1935 – Julie Andrews, British actress and singer
1963 – Mark McGwire, American baseball player

Pretty historic day. You've got the end of the Nuremburg Trials, the start of Communist China, Johnny Carson taking over the Tonite Show and Disney World opening. Not to mention Disney opened Epcot Center on the same date some years later. That's one place I really want to go. I'd love to go to all those different countries and drink beer. Dan did it one time on 'Rosanne.' It was classic.

Top 5

The Top 5 Sports Brawls continue with a gridiron clash at #2.

#2 Miami vs. Florida International



Once again I lucked out in the sports brawl world. This terrible game was being broadcast on ESPN Gameplan, which I had purchased at the time. I just happened to glance up at the screen as this thing started and it was worth the $100 for Gameplan just to see this. Aside from the awesome fight with dudes hitting people with helmets there was the commentary of ex-Hurricane Lamar Thomas who channeled his inner hood rat and almost ran down to the field to join in. Fast forward to the 1:48 mark in the video below for his classy comments.

BOO!

Jailer treated after deputy shoots him accidentally
Associated Press

BANDERA — Be careful who you say "Boo!" to.

A Bandera County jailer was shot in the thigh after he jumped out and roared at a deputy in a darkened room at Bandera County Sheriff's Department office.

Chief Deputy Don Berger says Deputy A.J. Griffin shot 22-year-old Daniel Spengler before dawn Sunday. Spengler was airlifted to Wilford Hall Medical Center in San Antonio for treatment.

Berger says the 36-year-old deputy "revert to his training" when the jailer jumped at him, shooting Spengler once, then giving him first aid.

Griffin is on paid leave until the Texas Rangers complete their investigation. Berger says Spengler's wound does not appear to be life-threatening, but he faces possible disciplinary action after he recovers.

I love this story, despite the fact that I am quite easily startled and it has been a continual problem for me over the years. One time McIntosh snuck into my house and snuck up behind me after I got out of the shower. I screamed for five minutes...even after I saw it was him. And Welch used to creep up behind me every day at Athletic Supply. I'm not sure what my phobia is about sneak attacks but its bad. How bad do you think the San Antonio EMTs laughed at these poor bastards at Bandera?

P.S. - I looked up clips of people getting scared and Ellen is all I found. Live with it.